CURRAN: And another thing...

By KELLEY CURRAN
Local Columnist

June 23, 2009 01:58 pm

— And another other thing…

Once again, recent news and events lends itself more to adding further comment on topics already discussed in this space than to an entirely new subject, so let’s look at some new developments regarding old themes.
SOCIALISM IS TURNING ME INTO A LIBERAL
I may have, on a couple of occasions, suggested that the policy preferences of President Barack Obama smack of socialism. I am sure that, on one occasion, I suggested the obscenely large dollar amounts involved in the various bailout schemes had made smaller, though still obscene, price tags for government programs suddenly seem like great deals. The proposed cash for clunkers is an excellent example of this newly warbled perspective.
The proposal would give consumers up to $4,500 for trading in their less fuel-efficient vehicle for a new, more efficient one. In theory, it would stimulate auto sales and reduce carbon emissions, not to mention hook us all up with cash toward a new ride. All this could be bought for less than $4 billion. Chump change! And we get the money back anyway because we own the car companies. It’s like we have a corporate-welfare coupon for 95 percent off and a free hot dog.
CHANGE WE CAN BE DISILLUSIONED BY
Speaking of our still slightly new president: I apologize to any gay-rights or health-care reform supporters who found any encouragement in my opinion that Obama seemed like such a guy of character.
If you thought Obama’s health care reform would lead to a single-payer plan, you were misled. What has been proposed by the administration is really just a continuation of incremental tweaking of the current system. Radical, huh? There will be some hand-wringing by the health care and insurance industries for the cameras, and grandstanding by the politicians about how much they’ve helped us, but on the whole, any change will be at the margins.
Gay-rights activists should be spitting mad. Instead of working to reverse the Defense of Marriage Act — the federal law which defines marriage as between one man and one woman — as Obama promised during his campaign, his administration defended the act in a recently filed legal brief. Obama could work quickly to reverse the military’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy, itself a widely derided attempted compromise put in place by Bill Clinton, but hasn’t.
Instead, last week, he presented the consolation prize of some extended benefits to same-sex partners of federal government employees. Hardly the impression he gave those writing big campaign donations with hopes of bold support for their agenda. Some have already vowed to stop sending the checks.
GOOD, CLEAN GOSSIP KEEPS US HONEST
I mentioned the online forums last week. What I haven’t ever mentioned here is my belief in the potential goodness of gossip. It’s no secret I spend way too much of my time hanging around establishments that cater to my coffee habit. The one I spend the most time at also caters to two other habits — waffles and gossip. The waffles I’m not so big on, but I’ve been raised on the steady stream of gossip.
It occurred to me a few years ago as I watched the gossip queen of that establishment wink and raise her eyebrows at a longtime and moderately high-profile customer while insinuating all she knew about the man to his companions that gossip will keep you honest. If everyone knows you were a dog 20 years ago, you know they know and there are the gossipers of the world to keep that knowledge alive, you are not going to get away with acting holier than thou today.
Now, I’m not going to get real explicit about the particular subject of gossip which racked up page after page of discussion on the forums. However, I do believe that if seemingly everyone in the local media market and beyond is brutally discussing a particularly humbling moment in your life, especially given the life-expectancy of something on the Internet, it will become exceedingly difficult for you to maintain an attitude of superiority when addressing others in your community. You may try it, but it will never be taken as seriously again. It doesn’t mean you’re lesser than everyone else, but it does confirm — and document — that you’re no better.
FAIRIES ARE REAL
That’s all I have to say about that.
Jeffersonville resident Kelley Curran will occasionally eat waffles, but only if served with heaping scoops of gossip. Tell her the latest by writing to kelinawriterhat@aol.com.

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