Published: January 13, 2008 01:22 am      

PARENT POLITICS: Election offers teachable moments for mom and dad

Georgetown’s Cheri Fluhr says she’s more aware of political issues and candidates’ platforms this election year than maybe ever before. She has her 13-year-old daughter Kendal to thank for that.

“When she got up this morning, the first thing she wanted to know was who won the New Hampshire primary,” Fluhr said of the Highland Hills eighth-grader. “Her interest has made me pay more attention because I know she has questions. I turn on the six o’clock news more now so we can both keep up on issues.

“Over the past few months we’ve talked about a lot of things — why we have primaries, low voter turnouts, the importance of knowing about each of the candidates and what they believe,” Fluhr said. The fact that Kendal could very likely see the first woman or African-American president elected has piqued the girl’s interest in the ‘08 election as well, and led to a mom-daughter discussion about womens’ fight for voting rights.

Whatever the topic, Fluhr said, she aims to be open with her daughter, even about the difficult topics like abortion or gay marriage. “I always try to tell her that ‘this is my point of view, you may have another opinion.’ I want her to understand that people can have different views, that we can agree to disagree.”

Taking an open-minded approach is one of the most important moves a parent can make when discussing politics with their children, a guidebook by the U.S. Department of Education advises. “As children grow older, they develop opinions of their own. If you bombard them with your opinions, you may become disappointed when they have contrary opinions. Educate them on the political process, and be accepting of their views.

Herb London, president of Hudson Institute, a world-renowned think-tank in Washington, D.C. and a formal New York gubernatorial candidate, recommends parents take their children with them to the voting booth to let them see how actual voting takes place. Encouraging children to read about candidates in the newspaper and organizing and participating in mock elections at school are other “desirable methods to encourage children to get involved and understand the right and privilege to vote,” he said.

For young children, political science professor Robert M. Alexander, who has spoken to his daughters’ kindergarten classes about the political process, says he finds its useful to bring issues to the child’s level.

“How do you choose what games you play at recess? How do you solve problems with your friends or siblings — do you fight each other, talk to each other, tell a parent/teacher? I explain to them that these are the same types of issues governments deal with. Different candidates and parties have different ways they deal with issues,” said Alexander, a professor at Ohio Northern University.

“Also, I may ask them if they know anybody who is in Iraq or Afghanistan. This provides a way to introduce the problems of conflict in international relations. From there, you can talk to them about causes of conflict and what to do about it. This further enables you to note that different people have different ideas as to how we make policy, both domestically and internationally.”

If you think international relations is too advanced a subject for your child, consider some of the topics debated by elementary school children on the Scholastic News Online message boards — global warming, reinstatement of the draft, children’s health care, education funding, separation of church and state and trade with China.

Scholastic News Online, part of education publishing company Scholastic, Inc., has 50 reporters in schools around the country, covering the 2008 election for its Web site and magazine. It can be found at www2.scholastic.com. Other sites of interest are PBSkids.org (check out The Democracy Project) and Kidsvotingusa.org.

While Fluhr said she is ready to answer just about all the questions her daughter can throw her way, she admits she may have to turn to one of the popular kids’ Web sites if she’s asked to explain how the electoral college system works.



talking to your kids about politics



1. Be open. Your kids should feel that they can ask you questions.

2. Help them get the facts. Answer questions honestly and clearly, but don’t go into unnecessary detail.

3. State your personal views, but be clear that there are differing views. Kids should know that even if people hold opposing views, including neighbors and relatives, they are still good people.

4. Teach kids that debate is a critical component of democracy.

5. Let your kids know that they can disagree with you and still be a part of the family.

6. Use dinner table conversations to encourage discussion and lively disagreement about current events.

7. Use resources (Web sites, newspapers, reference books, other parents, etc.) if you are not sure how to answer a question.

8. Be careful about mixing morality and politics. If the candidate that you view as more moral slips up in the future, you will have a lot of explaining to do.

9. Encourage children of all ages to express their opinions about the world.

10. Respect children’s points of view, but encourage healthy disagreement by teaching children to defend their own ideas and remain open to new information and ideas.

Sources: Family & Children First; The New York Child Study Center



Involving Your Children In Politics:

• Choose an issue that affects them, such as education or the environment. Follow the issue through the media, and talk to your child about which candidate reflects your views.

• Go to the polls with your kids. Parents can have a big influence on the future voting patterns of their children. Let them see you take the time and effort to vote.

• On Election Day, watch TV and pay attention to close races. Talk to your kids about what the results of local elections will mean for your family.

Source: Family & Children First





The following are guidelines of what questions kids are likely to ask according to different stages of development.



Children under 5

• Children in this age group are concrete thinkers. They do not always differentiate between what is real and what is fantasy. A concrete thinker watching television — with its quick edits and vivid imagery — is especially susceptible to being confused or scared by political discussions. During the coverage of 9/11, for instance, when the news stations kept showing the disaster over and over, some young kids thought it was happening all over again. A good rule of thumb with this age group is not to tell them more than they want to know. Answer their concrete questions with short concrete answers.



Children 6-9

• Kids in this age group have a better understanding of cause and effect, but they tend to think in black and white, giving them a strong sense of right and wrong. Children at this age will have difficulty understanding that other people may have opinions that are different than theirs. Explain that everyone has a right to express their opinion, but it is important to show tolerance to people who disagree.

• Children in this age group will start to make the connection between government and safety. It is key to let children know that many layers exist to protect that safety — stretching from home to school, teachers, police officers, all the way up to government. The purpose of government is to insure that safety. Understanding the purpose of government can help them understand the importance of voting and elections.



Children 10-12

• The reasoning and reactions of these children are more complicated because they are able to comprehend nuances better. Parents should take their cue from the child: every child at this age is aware that we’re at war and it’s an election year. They are probably going to have an opinion.

• The questions children this age might ask are sometimes a request for information and sometimes the request masks a concern, such as loss of parents’ jobs or safety of a friend or relative in the military.



Teenagers

• Teenagers are apt to have strong opinions and expect to be heard. As they try to establish their own identity and view of the world, peers exert a strong influence, and discussions may become heated. Teenagers may feel more and more concerned about abstract questions, the party system, the meaning of war, and their own personal involvement.

• For those teenagers who want to feel involved, it helps if they are part of a group, if they write letters, participate in campaigns and let their voices be heard.

• So what do you do when your teenager takes a position and maybe action that is diametrically opposed to your position politically? Open discussion is extremely important. Do your best to separate personal opinion from fact and encourage your child to do the same. Have her gather as many facts supporting her position as possible. It is possible that she may have misinformation and as a parent, you can help her learn to separate opinion and facts and that “there’s more than one side to every story.” Of course, you might also be misinformed, so be prepared, keep an open mind and let her know you respect her point of view.

Source: The New York Child Study Center