Published: October 05, 2008 12:24 am            

CUMMINS: It’s healthy for fat cats to lose weight

My financial life is not going so well. Since outgoing expense has recently shot up over income, I’m between a rock and a subprime.

I don’t have any stock options, severance packages or bonus deals in my portfolio, which is so tattered my dog must be chewing on it. If I can find a loan shark in China, I could borrow. But unless the economy gets a little better and Alpo drops in price, my dog might have to be sacrificed like an Old Testament fatted calf.

The government has been in a tizzy trying to decide how to bail out the big banks, which makes me wonder why they wouldn’t dip down and rescue an ordinary feller. I’d contribute to any political campaign, although it might be in live-chicken denominations like we paid the doctor back when he’d come and cure Aunt Fannie Mae’s dropsy.

Back in the old days, we fed our dogs table scraps. Save a little gravy from the skillet, pour it over some beans and our dogs didn’t have to run rabbits. Of course, we’d hunt rabbits when running a little short on meat, but we made it through the tough times on our own.

And if a neighbor had money troubles, we didn’t bail them out like the government did with Fannie Mae, we’d go help them bale their hay and take along some garden things.

Critics blame the economic meltdown on deregulation of the financial industry. Give Wall Street free rein, and they’ll create all sorts of financial schemes such as derivatives, swaps and shorts to make big bucks fast.

It’s astonishing what effect greed can has on ethics. Back in the old days, we regulated ourselves, did an honest day’s work and lived within our means; there was no other choice.

In the past few years, there’s been one bubble splat after another. Nine years ago, many people bought into the tech-stock craze, which ultimately exploded, and it took years for the market to regain the loss.

A couple years after tech crashed, we bought into the Iraqi bubble, because Saddam Hussein held our security, peace and prosperity in the palm of his grimy hands. But we’re still spending $12 billion a month in Iraq while their oil profits have boosted their budget surplus to $79 billion.

When will they pay the nearly $1 trillion back we’ve borrowed to rid them of weapons of mass destruction? But as one critic said, the weapons of mass destruction we’re dealing with now are in Washington.

Now it’s the housing-price and bankrupt bubble, plus the Washington inflated-head — or vacant-head — bubble. I used to think elected officials sent to Washington were reasonably honest and intelligent, but it doesn’t take long for most to loose sight of why they went there.

Our society and, particularly the government, have lost all sense of, “seen-it-coming.” Or perhaps, we saw it coming, but continued voting “them” back in despite their collective refusal to accept the responsibility for the common good.

It’s evolved into nothing but a partisan blame game.

“Republicans caused it. No, Democrats did. Don’t blame Bill Clinton just because he had sex. Don’t blame George Bush, who quit drinking and found God.”

The current political and economic volcanic quagmire is like what happens in a junior high gym class when the teacher walks out of the room.

As of this writing, the first attempt at the bail out was voted down. One major reason for the failed vote was because the greedy, corporate fat cats keep getting fatter.

Not that many years ago, corporate executives averaged making four times the pay of the average U.S. worker. According to the latest survey of United for a Fair Economy, CEOs of large corporations averaged $10.8 million in total compensation in 2006, or more than 364 times the pay of the average U.S. worker.

The total yearly compensation the past year for some officers of the troubled banks and financial institutions was: Morgan Stanley — $21 million; Lehman Brothers -— $34 million; and Goldman Sachs three top officers earned $70 million, $71 million and $72.5 million. Are they fed up yet ... and you?

My dog didn’t foresee her living expenses suddenly rising more than 20 percent. She doesn’t worry about the price of gas or the rapid depreciation of her doghouse.

And when I try explaining to her that my dwindling pension fund might require our chasing rabbits again, she rolls over and goes back to sleep. It’s the same response we get from Washington.

Bail Terry Cummins out at TLCTLC@AOL.com.

        

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